Lolita My Sin, My Soul

*Spoiler alert*

I have just finished reading Vladimir Nabokov’s Lolita.  I’m feeling confused, don’t know how to describe my feelings.  My main thoughts about Humbert are lying paedophile with mental issues, but I also can’t help feeling sorry at him for being completely in love (read: obsessed) with Lolita.  The heart wants what the heart wants.  We're all "well aware" of the stupid things we do for things called “love”, add some mental illness and childhood trauma to the mix, of course you’ll be a Humbert.

My life so far has been average and free from violent tragedy, so I wouldn’t know much about Humbert’s trauma regarding Annabel Leigh’s death.  The deep regret he’s feeling, was it just about unable to consummate their love?  Seriously? What year is it again?! At twelve I’m still fooling around with my friends with little to no regard about boys.  And then there’s the way he threatened her when she declined his advances… That is just wrong.  Just because you do the wrong thing for the right reason is still wrong.  It doesn’t make everything okay.  Just because Lolita resembles Annabel doesn't take away the fact that she is his stepdaughter.  That is just... Incest. Ewww.

Nevertheless, this is a great novel. It left me feeling exasperated and I started making my own judgement while reading and I usually reserve my judgement until after reading.  I even laugh at Charlotte’s untimely death (Pretty sure I'm gonna pay for this...)  That car came out of nowhere, as if the universe conspires to realize his lust for Lolita.  This novel also left me wanting to take a deep breath and thinking about life, and I can't stop asking questions such as if he had consummate his love with Annabel, would Humbert grows up to be mentally stable?  Is he just a plain pervert who tries to justify his action and feelings for much younger girl?  What if Charlotte didn't get hit and unfolds Humbert’s true nature?  Oh, humanity!  I feel so old after reading this.

I always think that I'd prefer moderation in life, but Lolita caught me off guard and toss me around after toying with my emotion and reason, making me debating with myself, am I capable of loving someone like Humbert? Do I want to be loved like that? What is the line between love and obsession?  Humbert loves Lolita more than anything.  Lo-lee-ta.  That’s not even her real name.

Nutella, with Love

When you thought Nutella couldn't get any better, they said you could have your own personalized bottle of Nutella.  Don't you just love Nutella? I'm getting one for myself! Then I can finally say "Of course that's my Nutella, its got my name written on it! See?"

Isn't that just fantastic?